Like Father, Like Son: A Greeting Beyond Christmas
Every home is unique, particularly during festive seasons, and the ways we choose to celebrate can differ massively. We collectively create rituals that become embedded in our family culture.
In my family, the role of the Christmas light-bearer belongs to my father, while the rest of us play the role of mere acolytes. I have always been fascinated and amused by the joy that Christmas brings him and his efforts to make the season magical. I used to think of him as just an old man with quirks, but now I realize how quickly the years pass for all of us - he was not even as old as I thought (he died before the age of 60 years). He takes on the task of buying and setting all the Christmas decorations - sometimes not minding doing it alone. However, he always appreciated our "Oh, wow!" reactions.
Every year, he adds a new collection of Christmas songs, buys all the condiments, and spends time preparing meals with everyone in the kitchen. I remember one Christmas when he took it upon himself to cook while we watched. He spent the rest of that Christmas holiday telling our guests how he was the one who cooked - and made reference in subsequent years. He aimed to make each Christmas a little more perfect than the last. No matter who you are and how/what you feel about Christmas, he has a way of making it penetrate and resonate deeply with you.
Nearly a decade after his passing, I take cues from my mother's constant fussing about Christmas. She may not know, but as someone who tries to understand incidents and people above the surface level, I see that she searches for the kind of love and warmth my father provided during this season.
Thus, my title, "Like Father, Like Son," reflects the moments when she indirectly tries to ignite in me the same spirit my father had for Christmas and wished I could be more like him during this period. I still find his enthusiasm for the holiday intriguing. I often wonder if other fathers share this passion, but many fall into the category of acolytes instead. While I can't ask him directly, I've concluded that my father, much like myself, understood that life can be bland and always sought opportunities to celebrate and create positive emotions out of little things, which I do not - I simply try to find humour in mundane things to entertain myself.
On the other hand, Christmas is a melancholy period for me, prompting me to listen to bittersweet songs about longing and loss or watch sad Christmas movies. I find sad Christmas films particularly intriguing because of the emotions they stir within us. Take "Home Alone," for instance. It is a story about a young boy left behind by his family who navigates challenges on his own while fending off burglars. The movie makes us share his loneliness, worries, distress, longing, and safety concerns.
Additionally, the simultaneous feeling of excitement and longing such movies stir in us can also remind us that while the Christmas season is a time for celebration and joy for many, it carries complex emotions for others. My father's relentless pursuit of a magical Christmas taught me the value of finding joy in life's simple moments. However, it also serves as a poignant reminder of those we've lost and the events in our lives that no longer feel the same. Leaving us sometimes wishing we could turn back the clock.
For many, Christmas is filled with memories of friends and loved ones, and it can be difficult when traditions that once brought joy are now tinged with sadness. It could be friends, well-wishers, or lovers with whom Christmas could not happen without exchanging gifts, spending time, or having long chats/calls with them, but now, life has happened, making things not work out. More so, there are personal challenges, health struggles, or the absence of loved ones in the form of death, which can make the season a time of reflection.
These realities emphasize the importance of approaching the holiday with compassion and understanding, appreciating its ability to connect us with one another. Through bittersweet songs, nostalgic traditions, or even sad Christmas movies that evoke longing and hope, the season provides an opportunity to celebrate resilience, create meaning, and take a break from a long year, even in difficult times. It also gives the opportunity for introspective reflections for the coming year.
I often wonder if I will one day become the joy of Christmas for my future family or if I will always be an acolyte—adding another layer to the complexities of my "like father, like son." Judging from my Christmas mood, the similarities with my father highlight an asymmetrical relationship.
Nevertheless, until that day (the day), I will have my wife and children - to find out and probably beyond... I will keep wishing you a Merry Christmas and a Prosperous New Year on a blank white screen - hoping you read and have a bittersweet smile.
I created a beautiful Christmas playlist on Spotify. If you are interested, please send me a direct message so I can share it with you.
Many thanks for reading my perspective and giving feedback.
My fervent wish is for the personal growth of everyone and the success of all young professionals who put their hearts and souls into finding their purpose in life.
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