The Pressures Beneath the Surface of Effortlessly Perfect or Perfectly Effortless

Sep 28, 2024

Photo by **Konstantin Mishchenko** on **Pexels**

Effortless perfection is the false illusion most of us have about others and ourselves. It is the pressure that comes from the expectation to appear like a winner without needing to appear trying or visibly doing so much.

It has its traces in almost every aspect of our lives. At workplaces and in careers, we want to be seen advancing steadily—climbing the ladder of success—without making it obvious how much effort or ambition is driving us. By striving to appear that success comes naturally without seeming overly eager or desperate for recognition.

Socially, the pressure is just as intense. We're expected to fit seamlessly into various social groups and be effortlessly liked simply by showing up and "being ourselves." Yet, this version of ourselves must strike a delicate balance: unique enough to stand out yet relatable enough to blend in, sharing common ground with others.

Show others we can have an intellectual conversation, but our insights must be shared without appearing arrogant or braggadocios. Therefore, academically, it is expected to excel in your studies while simultaneously projecting an air of ease. The goal is to be seen as sociable and approachable, thriving in class yet seemingly the least concerned with grades. It’s as if the ideal is to appear both underprepared and highly successful at the same time.

In our interactions on social media, there’s a version of us who wishes to show our sense of fashion, places visited, and pictures as people who are on the moving trend. However, must also be perceived as struggling and dealing with life like the rest of the world.

Therefore, we always talk about how much we have to do, how others have figured it out better than us and are coping just fine, and how we struggle to achieve personal goals—while maintaining the expectation that no one should see us do it.

Though many people are doing better here, effortless perfection (where everything seems polished without effort) also means masking any sign of loss, failure, or sadness.

Generally, there’s nothing effortless here. Because these expectations can create invisible pressures, where we may feel the need to hide our struggles, stress, or hard work, this could make us worry about how we are perceived by others more than necessary—that is, even if having a concern about what others think about us should be the case anyway.

Merely striving for effortless perfection based on personal experience is the root cause of self-doubt and exhaustion. This is why I have been working on being ‘perfectly effortless’ (where ease and authenticity are more valued than appearing perfect).

It means that I have stopped chasing to be perceived as uncracked to embrace my imperfections and acknowledge my vulnerabilities.

I can now admit how hard it is for me to manage life and everything it throws at us, which makes navigating it so tiresome. I also freely open up about my fears and welcome any form of support when needed.

Many thanks for reading my perspective and giving feedback.

My fervent wish is for the personal growth of everyone and the success of all young professionals who put their hearts and souls into finding their purpose in life.

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